Tag Archives: writing

Closing A Door

Hello, everyone,

I wrote a draft of this blog post in December 2019 and reading through it now, months later, things haven’t changed for the better. Considering I’ve been trying to earn a steady income (or find a job), for 14+ years (since the last recession), I’ve had to add to it, so it’s a long post. Please bear with me.

I wish I had good news to share but…

I’m still floundering. I’ve lost my voice for this site. With no paying clients, I have nothing to draw from to talk about, to give you encouragement, or added insight. I’m tapped out.

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My initial intentions…

I’ve tried for more than a decade to form a community, not only with my radio shows but with my helpful weekly blog posts, live-streaming, a newsletter, even a Yahoo Group for local Businesswomen (which lasted for nine months, had only one other person who joined and I ended up helping her land the job she wanted and gave her motivation to re-launch her etsy store – all pro bono).

I’ve said and taught all I’ve wanted to say and teach about job/life coaching (w/my 3-year weekly stint on the radio and its own site, Another Day Dawns, now defunct), and, then about connecting with your loved ones on the Other Side (w/another 3-year weekly stint on the radio and with this site). Without new experiences to talk about, new issues/questions from people to brainstorm about, new challenges to meet which my clients give me, I have nothing else to offer you, I’m afraid.

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And, financial struggle continues to ensue,

I’m still not earning an income. As of a couple of weeks ago, my son is furloughed (update below), meaning he isn’t working and isn’t getting paid for staying at home. The store he’s working for furloughed 70 out of 100 employees. They are working with a skeleton crew, no one allowed in the store, curbside pickup only. My son worked under these conditions when the initial stay-at-home order came to our city/county for two weeks, then stayed home. The stress was overwhelming.

The store had turned off air conditioning and lights,( in 95 deg F weather down here in Florida!), customers expected their online orders to be filled right away, but there were only 2 people pulling the items for 100+ orders! Anyway, after two weeks, he came home and the company paid him for two weeks, like everyone else staying home. Then, the furlough happened. No pay.

He quickly filed his taxes so we could get his return and he got his economic payment (from the stimulus packet), for $1200. Unfortunately, I received nothing. Since my son is claiming me as a dependent on his taxes for the last two years while I try to become financially independent again, (and because he’s been paying all the bills), I get no financial help from the government. If I was a child, he’d get an extra $500 but I’m not, so we won’t.

Update: Son has been working from home for a couple of months now. He was one of two employees brought back. Luckily, it was a week before all our money ran out. He’s still owed a week’s worth of unemployment but hasn’t been able to get through to anyone on Florida’s site. It had taken them 11 weeks plus an email to our senator for the intern to look into it for him. He must have done something to call attention to my son’s claims because his unemployment benefits finally kicked in. That was close to, as we were days away from having $0 for anything: food, mortgage, bills.

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Reality

The truth is, I’m lucky if I get one or two paying clients a year and I can’t live off of $100-$200 annually! I’ve tried giving numerous discounts, holding giveaways to bring in sign-ups to my newsletters (which I had to abandon because I couldn’t afford to pay for a P.O. Box to use as my address on my “mass mailings” after two years), ran polls to try to get feedback/input on what my audience needs and is willing to pay for. Alas, no response.

Over the last decade, I’ve tried all the things business coaches tell you to do to promote your business, and these things simply haven’t worked for me. I’ve given away $1000s worth of my services which have left me penniless.

To be honest, struggling financially has only made my grief worse. The added stress every day, every month of surviving, literally, is taking its toll.

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Effects of Grief

You see, I’m just not the same person I was before my husband’s death. Yes, the fog of grief has mostly cleared from my mind but I still have difficulty multi-tasking. It still takes an enormous amount of energy to *do* anything, especially if I know it won’t make a damn bit of difference for my financial present and future, and thereby, my son’s future.

I believe all my job/life coaching services and my mediumship services have helped 10,000s of people, reflected in this site’s views but also in the number of  listens on both of my radio shows these past 10+ yrs. But, no marketing efforts have resulted in paying clients.

I take that back: the one new paying client found me on the Best Psychic Directory and visited this site to vet me. Other than her, even that directory hasn’t brought in new clients these last two+ years, since I had to prove I was legit in order to be posted there.

With 30,000+ views/listens, one single paying client barely pays for the upkeep, and doesn’t pay at all for the platform and system I use to schedule appointments, and to receive payments! It certainly doesn’t help with paying my mortgage, or food, utilities, or any other bills.

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Which leads to my other challenge: Tech Issues

I know action dissolves anxiety. I also know that speaking (not just texting or typing) feeds my energy, and I don’t have anyone to talk to other than my son. And, I can’t talk to him about politics (even though I do a tiny bit) because it gets him very upset.

I lost my best friend and my greatest supporter three years, nine months ago (on the 14th), and I lost all the income we had when Hank passed away. I was already frustrated and depressed before his health crisis, but at least I had him to vent to, to comfort me, to encourage me, to support me in *any and all* my endeavors. And…that support is gone. Yes, I know he is still with me spiritually, and he has helped my son and I survive these last few years. Oh, the synchronistic events that have happened would amaze you! But, his strong, loving physical presence is nowhere to be found.

My cable company took three friggin’ YEARS to finally figure out my cable issues (hint: it wasn’t the damn modem they kept replacing because they wouldn’t actually check their hardware *outside*), but after a few weeks, (and them not replacing the hardware, just tweaking it), it seems like my connection is spotty again and my phone is still having the same problem (muting either myself or the person I’m talking to–no, it’s not the phone, have tried it with another phone–both landlines) which means it’s impossible to use it for any possible clients. (Note: A few months ago, I had a paying client–whom I’ve seen before–and had to call her back three times within one hour due to the phone issues!). I’ve had it.

It seemed like I was making headway with videos and live-streaming over the last several months with producing weekly videos, or planning to schedule live events, and I even live-streamed a support video every night for those whom needed my help with adjusting to staying-at-home 24/7. I’ve been doing that for 15+ years, so I have some insights and advice!

After a week, I changed the live-stream to weekly, and after two or three more live-streams, I shut it down. There was no audience for it, no one to help and the only people who popped in were trolls. I banned all of them as soon as I could.

Technical difficulties have been rampant and as of a few months ago, the hard drive for my 10-yr old iMac has crashed. “The disk has a hardware problem that cannot be repaired.” Luckily, I had backed up everything on my computer in September 2019, but I’ve lost the ability to create videos. My son’s computer doesn’t have a webcam, and not sure how well it can handle streaming. I’ll be verifying this in the next day or two as I may try to stream gameplay only, just to keep my sanity intact. (Update: it can’t handle all apps needed to stream a game.)

The momentum I had with all the plans I wanted to put into action months ago, it’s all gone and I can’t seem to get it back. And, now, I have no computer save my son’s 5-yr old computer which is already struggling to work. It’s slow and I can’t have more than one app open at a time, much less more than two tabs open on my browser.

I guess what I’m trying to say is: I’m giving myself one or two months more, but if I don’t get any paying clients through this site by then, I’m letting it go, even though I paid my annual fee to WordPress in February for another year.

I’ll then keep this site up until January 2021 and will then delete it.

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Closing a Door

So, now is the time. If you want me to do live brainstorming sessions for your job hunt, or a life challenge, or talk about grieving, or have a place where we can practice our psychic abilities (we all have them – intuition), let me know! I’ll see if this computer can handle a Zoom gathering but…there’d be no video. Remember? I have no webcam. It would just be audio.

However, if we do this, I will have to charge a minimal amount for participation, like a membership site. We could even do something using Discord. I think this computer can handle Discord. These events would be private, invite-only after payment.

If there are no comments, I know closing this door is the right thing for me to do. Perhaps it will free my mind up to think anew, rather than plugging away at something that clearly wasn’t meant to be.

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Gratitude

I know how many of you I’ve helped over the years and I thank you for allowing me to connect you with your loved ones on the Other Side, and teaching you to do the same directly. Most of you had already been doing so, you just needed confirmation and assurance that you were receiving the signs being sent.

Others have needed time to pass to allow the shock and fog of grief to lift a little, before being able to sense the messages being sent. I hope I helped educate you too, to believe in whatever brings you comfort. No one else needs to believe that you connect with your departed loved ones. It’s a private matter but I hope you found comfort in knowing I believe you. I *know* you connect with them.

And, if I’ve alleviated your sorrow even just a little bit, even only momentarily, it was worth taking this risk to go public with my abilities. I know, especially as a widow myself, it was worth it.

Remember, you are loved and you are not alone. Your loved ones are always by your side, rooting for your success and your happiness.

Be still, be aware, and you will see/sense their messages of love and support.

Once again, thank you for allowing me to connect you with your loved ones on the Other Side. It was my honor to do so.

Be well, stay safe!! ❤

Love and light, ~Lisa

Copyright 2010 -2020. All rights reserved.

What is My Purpose?

Hello everyone!

You know, I’ve thought a lot about this question and the following post I wrote in 2013 entitled, What is The Purpose of Life?, these last 2-1/2 years, for so many reasons. I think I come back to it again and again because it offers me hope that through the fear and darkness we’re all living in these days, I know, deep in my heart, that lightness will prevail. And, when it does, won’t it be glorious?

Last August, I re-read my post, What is The Purpose of Life? through the eyes of a widow and I found some comfort in my own words.

Excerpt:

“There is so much wisdom to be gained from a negative experience but it can take some time for the wisdom to be recognized. Healing needs to take place before we can recognize it sometimes. Give yourself time to heal.”

Allowing myself the time to heal. That was the message that stood out for me then. Ten months later, I continue to push myself forward trying to rebuild my life, and “re-purpose” my life.

I still haven’t healed enough to realize why Hank left this physical world, and why now? But I know I’m farther along in my journey than 10 months ago, learning, growing, evolving into…this person who survived tragic loss and is still here. The wisdom will come, I’m sure, in time. And that brings me comfort.

For those of you who have ever asked this question or are trying to find your purpose, I hope you discover your own message, and perhaps some comfort, in the post as well.

It starts:

“Two weeks ago, Tony from NY asked: What is the purpose of life? Why are we here? I could also hear his concern about all the negative things that you see and read about and what kind of purpose those have, if any. I know he’s not alone, I know most, if not all of us, have these same questions and concerns throughout our lifetime so I wanted to expand upon my answer. Tony, I hope you’re listening.”

Continue reading: What is The Purpose of Life?

Love and light,

~Lisa

P.S. Tony was a caller to my radio show, Messages From The Other Side, and we had a wonderful conversation about his question, only to find out afterwards that the show hadn’t recorded! It was the only episode in more than three years of my show that didn’t record. Hmmm…

Copyright 2019 – All rights reserved.

Are You Holding Back From Enjoying Your Life?

If any of you have listened to my radio show, Messages From The Other Side, you always hear me encouraging my audience to write. I believe writing is extremely important: to vent, to ponder, to clarify your mind so you can release negative emotions and blocks, and open yourself up to revelations and possible solutions.

So, I took my advice last weekend and did some writing myself – I hesitate to say it’s automatic writing. It was more of a conversation between myself and those on the Other Side. My Higher Self, guides, guardians and angels. So, yes, messages from the Other Side. 😉 I got the sense of a group of loving beings or spirits, speaking collectively. It was pretty amazing.

One of my questions (ok, complaints) was: Why do I always have to be the one who initiates fun things with my family?

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Here’s the conversation (for the purposes of this post, Spirit is all-inclusive.):

Me: “Why do I always have to be the one who initiates fun things with my family? I’m tired of it. Sometimes I want to be asked to play, to join in, to go for a walk, play a board game.”

Spirit:  “Because you are you. By denying that, you are denying you and your loved ones of many happy times. All because your ego needs a boost.”

Me: “My ego? What? (I hadn’t realized that. Hmmm.) Well, as a result, I feel so alone.”

Spirit: “Yes, we realize that and that is a fallacy. You have to know that. All the anxieties, fears are because you are not living your life as your true self. You are the catalyst. You bring people together. That’s what you do. That’s why it’s usually YOU to bring up doing something, almost forcing them to participate in life together. It’s a good thing. Stop seeing it as a burden. It is one of your many gifts. In this same way, you’ll be very successful with groups, teaching, entertaining, yes, and learning too.”

Me: “Well, it’s irritating. I’m irritated with my husband and with my son about this – my skin (on my hands) has irritation on it. With life and my life too. I’m irritated with them for not being like me…[pause….revelation] ooooooooooo, interesting.” **cue the lightbulb moment music**

Spirit: “They have their own gifts and abilities, focus on those, enhance those, appreciate those, bring them out. That is YOUR gift and they know it and love you for it. They are sad that you are sad. They only want to help you but don’t know how.”

As I mentioned on last week’s episode, the fact that all this time, I’ve wanted them to be more like me, wanting them to initiate activities…like I did/do…when that’s not who they are! That’s my ego wanting them to prove that they love me enough to ask me to go for a walk, play a card or board game, or video game, watch a movie. Since they didn’t, no wonder I felt alone! Whoa. Major revelation.

I was shocked to realize my ego has held me back from not only acknowledging and appreciating my gift of motivating people, but also from acknowledging and appreciating my husband’s and son’s gifts and abilities – and from creating some fun memories! Ouch. That hurts.

By the way, even though they may groan initially about my suggestion, they always participate and thank me afterwards. “That was a good idea, hon.” “Yeah, that was fun, Mom.” 😀

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I have to say since I’ve had this revelation, my feelings of irritation have disappeared and my hands are healing. I feel much lighter. Cool, huh?

Where in your life are you letting your ego run the show? Where is your ego holding you back from living and loving your authentic self and your loved ones?

If you’re not sure, take a moment, tap into your intuition, Higher Self, any guides, guardians or angels you want (or all of them!), and ask. Then listen and let me know what you find out in the comments below.  🙂

 

Copyright 2014 – All rights reserved.